When my mother sends me an email with the subject line: Fwd: Re: Re: Fwd: Re: Fwd: Fwd: Re: [title], I usually just delete it. Seriously, if I get another chain letter threatening bad luck if I don’t forward this to 15 beautiful friends or else I will be cursed and unmarried, I might have to poke my eye out.
But every once in a while, she’ll send me something that actually bears truth or humor. This was one such email.
Why Men Are Happier People:
Your last name stays the same.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress: $5000. Tux rental: $100.
People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes.
Mom, thanks for letting me know why Matt is more happier than I am. And here I thought it was because he married me. 😉
While I may not agree with all of these, I appreciate the humor and 1 totally encompasses the entire reason I wish I was a boy (that’s not true, pretty much all of them do) – “One mood all the time.” <- when I picture heaven, that's what I get!
Love having you in my timezone! Stay…………please?….. I'll buy you a cupcake!
Orrrrr, sponsor my visa application and then I can come back to America with you – dream come true, right?! I don’t knnow why people don’t ask for my ideas more.
“Wedding dress: $5000. Tux rental: $100.”
Now that’s funny AND true! 🙂
AMEN SISTER! Preach it! Thanks for the laugh this morning. That list is awesome. 🙂
Haha, this is pretty awesome and funny! 🙂
True.. every single word
Ha! 🙂
OMG this is awesome! too funny and true! I only got half way down the list before I had to comment! lol
“The world is your urinal.”
Well ain’t that the truth?
“.. more happier than I am..”
You’re adorable!
LOL
So funny
This is too funny! The Lord knew I needed this laugh today. Thanks for sharing, Bianca.
Dude!!!! I was just re-telling the story about how alterations cost more than the actual dress and my husband spent 42 bucks on his wedding garb. Gah, I cleaned out my savings to pay for my dress because I hate credit cards.
So true…it seems like they have it easier, don’t they? 😉
Amen to that Mrs.Olthoff well apart from the “The world is your urinal” line.Am a man so yes for some men that line applies but not everyone.The rest i agree and its making me laugh.My best line “You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes.”