I heard the following question asked on the radio today and nearly died: Ask your spouse what it’s like to be married to you.
Being married to me is like one big party. Minus the balloons, cake, streamers, and confetti. So basically it’s a table with me sitting at one end. Maybe playing with fire.
No, but seriously. Why on earth would I ask Matt what’s it’s like to be married to me?! I already know it includes headaches, heartaches, stomachaches, and annoyance. But this question has permeated my mind and convicted me on a number of levels.
For starters, I have NEVER thought about what it’s like to live with me, but I ALWAYS will point out what it’s like to live with anyone else, be it a roommate, family member, friend, or spouse.
After some soul searching [Los Angeles traffic allows for 75 minutes of soul searching and occasionally fist pumping to pop music on my commute home], I discovered to following things:
- I’m neurotic. This is proven in the fact that I’ve asked my roommate and life partner 16,392 times in the last six months if I’m neurotic. Case. In. Point.
- I want the entire house to be clean, but as long as my bedroom door is shut, I can care less what pile of Emelda Marcos shoe collection or pile of books say about me.
- I have this thing about water stains on glass shower doors. I squeegee my shower doors constantly and Kaboom-them weekly.
- I care about everything. And when I say everything, you should know that it’s everything. I won’t ask you if you want vegetables with dinner, I’ll tell you why you need vegetables with dinner. I will tell you why you should know my opinion while subtly slipping in that my idea is waaaaaaay better than yours. I will take care of you and mother you in an annoying Nurse Ratchet kind of way, because—well—you don’t take care of yourself. Obviously.
The list goes on and on, but boiled down to the ugly dross is the sad realization that I’m a nag. A contentious woman who is highly opinionated, but has a good heart. But good hearts with no action plan only lead to boring headstones.
Matt has always taught me to lead with the end in mind. His reference was to my teaching style, but I’ve taken his advice and applied it to my life. I want to live my life focused on the finish line [2 Timothy 4:7]. When I leave this earth, will my roommates talk about my mildew-free showers or my quiet and listening spirit? Will my husband say that I served him respectfully or nagged him constantly? Will people I serve say I mothered them or launched them to dream bigger dreams?
And since I want life to be one, big party, join me at the table. Bring the confetti, cake, streamers, and stories of what your roommates would say about you. If you want to lead with the end in mind, how are you living now versus how you want to be remembered when you die?
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Unfortunately there are a lot of blurring of lines these days of what is moral and what is legal.
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