Someone asked me a question on Formspring about eating and dieting. Asking me to speaking about gluttony and dieting is akin to asking Scrooge McDuck about his principle for giving money away or asking Snooki how she tans so naturally. I always shy away from this topic because it leaves me open to criticism, failure, and the vicious cycle of the weight yo-yo.
Food became my frienemy [friend + enemy]. And overeating became separate than any other sin because eating was a necessity, so I justified my gluttonous actions and condoned my lack of discipline. But in the process of justifying my actions, I created a hierarchy of sins. And gluttony was a baby sin compared to, oh you know, MURDER!!!
I was totally okay, right? Wrong.
Gluttony [habitual overeating] falls short at addressing an issue women individually face. What overeating for you may not be overeating for someone towering 6 feet in the air. But what does God say about this? Check out Philippians 3:18-19. My God is my belly? Whoa. This stuck me with a profound ache. I had let my nature rule my conviction. However, I failed at seeing my legalism with dieting.
My mind worked out a spiritual equation: controlling my eating = being righteous. This is wrong! My issue was really my heart, but I had let my appetite mask issues of my heart. Without addressing my core issues, forcing myself to stop binging was like telling a parapalegic to stand up and walk. Not only is it impossible, it is embarrassing.
No one understood the emotional turmoil, guilt, embarrassment, and defeat that I felt when trying on clothes, stepping on a scale, or seeing the way people glanced at my ill-fitting clothing. I began to resent God and question why He wouldn’t help me. I was asking for help… and He was silent.
After failing at the 38 diets since the age of 12, I stepped off the scale saying one of two things: I hate me or I hate thee. I was seeking for a change in body, not a change of heart. And this was major battle.
I’ll be posting a video shortly, but what have been the major shortcomings in your understanding of gluttony, dieting, and weight issues? I hope to address any questions you have in the vlog. 🙂
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