The sun rises. The sun sets. The waves push. The waves pull. Life goes on and along a continuum uninterrupted unless something––stops. Today I stop.
Almost a year ago I set out with a list. Unintended to be a list of resolutions, it was drafted in January so it’s automatically gets labeled as such. The problem with resolutions is that we don’t like resolutes. Let’s face it, own it, walk in it. We are stiff-necked people who won’t put down the ice cream while complaining about bulge, won’t forgive while pleading forgiveness from our Father, and mull about in ministry wondering when the last shall be first.
Yes, the sun rises. The sun sets. The waves push. The waves pull. But it’s more than a continuum. It’s a promise. God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He’s unchanging and His words are true.
Since He is my unchanging Changer in life, I relied upon God to give me a list of things I wanted to accomplish. I’m revisiting it to salvage this last month before the new year. I share these personal battles with you because you’ve been on this journey with me. One month to go…
The 2010 List:
1. Create world peace and end hunger. [Or at least try to.]
-Together we sponsored a sweet family from our blog community! With YOUR help we were able to donate money for food and gifts for Christmas last year.
-With YOUR help, blog readers helped send a team to Kenya for a missions trip. The accountant from Outreach made a stark observation: out of everyone on the trip, I had the most donations but the least amount of money. I was blessed to hear that. It showed me that every dollar counts, every prayer was felt, and every donation was accounted for (even small amounts) by YOU.
-Collected over one ton of food for families in the East Los Angeles area. Word to your motha’!
-Together we sponsored a sweet family from our blog community! With YOUR help we were able to donate money for food and gifts for Christmas last year.
-With YOUR help, blog readers helped send a team to Kenya for a missions trip. The accountant from Outreach made a stark observation: out of everyone on the trip, I had the most donations but the least amount of money. I was blessed to hear that. It showed me that every dollar counts, every prayer was felt, and every donation was accounted for (even small amounts) by YOU.
-Collected over one ton of food for families in the East Los Angeles area. Word to your motha’!
2. Be healthy, happy, and content with my weight. [No more binges, wacky diets, four-hour workouts, or genetically modified foods.]
-Ok, this one hurts the most. I tried to not care about the scale, but I did. And do. And will.
-I lost weight. Awesome. I’ve gained it back. Not awesome.
-I’m healthy, so I have one month to shape up.
-Ok, this one hurts the most. I tried to not care about the scale, but I did. And do. And will.
-I lost weight. Awesome. I’ve gained it back. Not awesome.
-I’m healthy, so I have one month to shape up.
3. Read two books a month. [One book to strengthen my character, one book for mind-rotting entertainment.]
-The average was 1.5 a month, but I’m happy with that.
-No mind-rotting trash 🙁
-The average was 1.5 a month, but I’m happy with that.
-No mind-rotting trash 🙁
4. Find an agent who believes in me and handles my bookings.
-I’ve been so blessed to be able to shift to a new manager this year.
-Bonus: I get to kiss my manager because he’s also my husband. Score!
-I’ve been so blessed to be able to shift to a new manager this year.
-Bonus: I get to kiss my manager because he’s also my husband. Score!
5. Create and produce curriculum for the summer series that’s fantastically amazing and spiritually inspiring. [Or even a small fraction of that.]
-Well, for those who attended the James study, chime in. I did my best—hopefully you thought so!
-Well, for those who attended the James study, chime in. I did my best—hopefully you thought so!
6. Be financially wise and frugal. [In being financially wise, I’d like to sponsor a child in a third world country and help domestically by investing in a non-Christian family near me.
–AmenHallelujahSweetBabyJesus!
-I finished paying off my car, all wedding debt, and learning to keep a—gulp—budget.
–AmenHallelujahSweetBabyJesus!
-I finished paying off my car, all wedding debt, and learning to keep a—gulp—budget.
-We are able to give to family and friends in need. Woooord!
7. Be emotionally stable. [I’m a dramatic ledge-walker. This is not cool.]
-Totally failed!
-Totally failed!
-I went to a counselor and worked on managing my personality rather than changing my personality.
8. Love out loud. [Even people who don’t wear deodorant or drive too slow on the freeway.]
-I haven’t mastered this, but I’m learning more and more how to love without bounds, thanks to two step-kids and a husband.
-I haven’t mastered this, but I’m learning more and more how to love without bounds, thanks to two step-kids and a husband.
9. Live out loud. [People should be able to see my faith and my Maker through my life… even when I don’t use words.
-Daily figuring this out, but excited about the progress.
-Daily figuring this out, but excited about the progress.
10. Build a community of people who want to change the world one day at a time. [Yes, this includes you.]
-I’m honored to do life with those on the blog. I read every comment, I pray for every request, and every chance I get to meet blog readers, I’m stoked to!
-I’m honored to do life with those on the blog. I read every comment, I pray for every request, and every chance I get to meet blog readers, I’m stoked to!
Thanks for being part of this. I’m not sure what this is, but I like it. And I hope we create goals together for this year and beyond.
I know you are gonna ROCK this list sister!! I LOVE that you LIVE out LOUD!!!! I have been journaling everyday with your encouragement that I get from visiting your blog. I can't wait to see where I've been, what I'm doing, and where I'm going! I can't thank you enough!!
AWESOME!!! My journal is my favorite thing. I love it and I know you will too 🙂
"Wont forgive while pleading for forgiveness from our Father" OUCHY! OUCHY! OUCHY!
No new years resolution for me… I make them I fail them.. every single one! I guess I can make one or plead for God to give me a merciful forgiving heart..
You writing that made my teeth bite my lip!!!! Ay Dios, only He can free me from an unforgiving heart but I am willing…
I speak this honestly because I struggle with it, too 🙁
Your #2 was identical to one of my goals for this year, as well as the results. *sigh*
Thank you so much for sharing! You encourage me to take every day as a new start and you remind me that in order to make progress I need to be looking forward. Thanks B! Muah!
Gosh, I love you, Cindy! We take "taste and see the Lord is good" literally 🙂 I refuse to gain any more weight. REFUSE!
You and your sister BOTH inspire me! J* keeps me motivated to push myself in photography, and you inspire me to watch and listen for God at times and in places I would normally be too busy or in too much of a hurry to see Him. And you both inspire me to blog more! One of my goals for 2011 (actually began this month) is to become financially wise and frugal. We've managed to get by without paying attention to spending. A recent income change (husband's new job at 30% lower salary) has changed that. I now have an ultimate budget/money tracking Excel workbook set up. We also have a 5-year plan to be credit card & car loan debt free! That one needs an AmenHallelujahSweetBabyJesus!
Bianca, so glad you are sharing this!! I have been doing the same analysis of my own personal goals, some of which are the same as yours like emotional stability, being happy and healthy with my weight, etc. I just found your blog and have been enjoying it the past few weeks, it is so wonderful to feel like there are others out there struggling with the same issues, who just love the Lord and are trying to soak that in and move from there each day. Keep up the good work, the Lord shines through your work and your fruit is showing!
Thank you for being so REAL. I seriously get so refreshed after reading your blog posts. Every woman struggles with a lot of these things, and it's so nice to hear you be real, open, and honest about it. Man, I just love your blog!!!
Change is not easy and no one ever said it would be. You have something in common with your father and that is transparency. I haven’t set time out to make a list but I will tell you this your father as my pastor and you as my sister in Christ have encouraged me to be transparent. Thank you for your openness!
The James study was awesome and much needed during that season in my life.. I took away so much and laid a foundation of what is to come in this new season!
Like Norma wrote, I hate writing lists cause I don’t complete them. I will write one for 2011 just to aim to pray more, read more, forgive more (I will pray for family members that have hurt me deeply and I know my heart will change through this).
James study came alive as I heard it online after work while making dinner you are a great orator of His Word and thanks for having the courage and will to share it.
Its a Joy to see Gods fathfulness in your life and I know he will continue to do more. Love you and all Juarez clan and Olthoff and De LaTorres.
Thanks for sharing your everything with us B! Your openness and honesty always challenges, inspires and encourages me.
I don't really make resolutions but I did write down some goals for this year. However, having a baby kinda diverted my attention somewhat! Looking forward to sharing the last 1/12 of 2010 and starting 2011 with you x
u did great on your list!! I can write lists and goals and resolutions forever..in fact i love writing them…it's the follow thru that messes me up…so ok, i will definitely write a list, just not one that sets me up to fail…but really i just want to be better in my spiritual walk and my prayer life…(believe me, i need tons of improvement everywhere else, but these are at the top of my list..) thanks for sharing lady! Love your blog, love your live out loudness and especially your love out loudness!!! You teach me lots and inspire me more and so glad to have been able to tag along for the year a look forward to the next one:)
B one more time thanks for sharing and for letting me feel like part of the community even though we don't know each other in person, yet jaja, and for being such a blessing from God. I've learned A.LOT. from you since I started following. This year I finally got to be part of the James Study and like I shared with you IT.ROCKED.MY.WORLD.! So thank you so much!! I hope to share whatever comes next in this journey with God! xoxoxo
On #5, you totally hit it out of the park! I absolutely LOVE your teaching style and how you go through each verse and explain things. I definitely matured spiritually and emotionally because of that course and some of the other courses you taught that I downloaded. You seriously have a great gift and I'm glad you're using it!!! 😉
I love this list Bianca, and I'm so glad we met this year at Catalyst. I share several of your, um, hangups, and love the idea of being a "ledge walker…" i need to manage my personality so much that I went and got a counseling degree….
blessings to you for 2011. Looks like it's gonna be an awesome year!
Peace & Grace Bianca.. REQUEST…
I am a Ipod and blog follower… And I was wondering if you can.. when you do another study and you have like notes that you give out to your church if there's anyway that i could download it or even if its something that should be brought i'd buy them. If You don't already have them if so PalEASSE tell me where o get them… lol because you have in your teachings on the ipod about homework and stuff like that… I live pretty far… where i live its sooo hard to find a place where womans studies are held not alot of women step up to it… And to be honest I'm getting the feeling i should start something…Just waiting on a word from God. Well Thank you for taking the time to read me…(smile) Stay, Be, and Do a blessing!
What a great post!! I am guilty of making a resolution list and life just seems to woosh that thing away to somewhere I can't find it. This is a great reminder that you should visit it to celebrate successes and work on those "negative" things.
I love how your couselor suggest that you work "on managing my personality rather than changing my personality." There IS a difference and it's yummy food for thought. Thanks for the free advice! heheh God Bless!
Dude the James study totally revealed that the things I feel I am lacking from my husband are the very things that the Lord is lacking from me! I have again realized that I am wretched and don't deserve this blessed life. As I allow God to do a work in me, he has blessed me by showing that I have a pretty amazing husband. This past month has been a real trial, but God has not left my side, and neither has my hubby. Through him I have experienced a sacrificial love that I have never seen before. I am taking him to a Seattle Seahawks game in Seattle as a thank you! Your faithfulness blesses people B. Thank you.
Wow..this is so similar to my scheduled post for tomorrow. I had just changed my mind about posting it…BUT NOW…I am inspired 😉
Thank God for your blogs!
Greetings from "AP"
Christmas 2009 will forever remain etched in our Minds. So thank you from the heart for helping us, help them. I am still in awe over Christmas 2009 and reflect back on it daily. "God will provide, it tells us in the Bible, HE and HE alone will provide" was what we hung on to then and now. The entire family that was with us has a home of their own now, and is doing well, they even have a puppy! My prayer for them is to turn to God!
Your generosity helped a family look to God and search within themselves for the deeper meaning of life.
I wish to each of you a "Merry Happy CHRISTmas"
with much love and appreciation from each one in the AP House!
You are doing great. Proud to know you.
Not sure if you have already sponsored a child, but there is a wonderful ministry called Promise Child where you can sponsor a child for $15 per month and 100% of every dollar goes directly to the child. The founder, Brent Kaser is the missions pastor at Calvary Chapel WestGrove in Garden Grove. My husband and I have had the blessing of traveling to Uganda, Haiti, Nepal and Mexico to see the ministry and be part of the difference that Promise Child is making all over the world. They also have kids in India and even here in America. Check out the website at http://www.promisechild.com Love your heart to impact the world for Christ.
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