As most of us are in a food coma from ham, stuffing, egg nog, and cookies, I want to gear up before the new year and reflect on the journey. This week is dedicated to revisiting posts that I feel best reflect 2011.
Though the content is the same, the sentiment of fear permeating our lives is still there. Have you conquered fear? Have you pursued a dream? Bring it on!
**********
Me: I want to do [______________] and I can’t.
Him: What’s stopping you from doing it?
Me: I don’t know. I can’t explain it…
Him: I don’t know you well, but I can tell you know what it is. And I’m pushing you to articulate whats holding you back.
Me: Okay, okay. I’m… I’m so… fearful.
Him: You’re fearful of being fearful?
Me: Yes.
Him: What’s the worst possible thing that could happen? What’s the worst case scenario? Lay it on me!
Me: I’m fearful of the consequences of following my heart and failing. I fear losing money on empty pipe dreams. I fear poverty. I fear inability to change what everyone seems to believe cannot. I fear failure and embarrassment and humiliation. I fear being a neglectful wife and poor step-mother and failing homemaker. I fear dreaming so big that I’m lost in the orbit of a universe outside of our galaxy… floating past the point of no return where I can’t come back and live a life I once did. But most of all, I fear the audacity of believing I can change the world and feeling ridiculous for believing I can.
Him: If all those things happen, are you still alive? Can you still dream? Will your family still love you? With all due respect Bianca, I don’t think your fear is of failure. No, your greatest fear is that you will succeed. And you don’t know what to do with that.
In pursuing the calling God puts in our life, what can fear kill? Everything. Fear will inhibit and thwart us from being the person we sense in our hearts we truly are. The one who is talented and compassionate and gifted. The one who is smart and logical and able. The one who is called and predestined and confirmed.
Me: What are you dreaming of? What is stopping you?
You: _______________
Oh, I so remember this post! This year I worked hard so I can transfer to a four-year Fall ’12 & pursue my dream of working with kids. God gave me the strength to work & go to school full time & I am excited/fearful about what is to come…but at least it is coming 😉 Thanks for pushing us to do more!
Boom!! I totally needed this reminder. Fear can drive me crazy at times. At the beginning of the year my greatest fear was a guy I really liked breaking up with me and me being alone for the rest of my life. My fear came true and it turns out that it was one of the best things to happen to me. God helped me conquer the regreat, pain, and hurt I felt during that time. I now dream big dreams that seem completely and utterly impossible but the fear of them never happening doesn’t happen all too much anymore because the Lord has reminded me that He works ALL things together for my good and if something doesn’t happen when or how I want, then something better will come my way. Love you B!
Did you read my thoughts this morning?! Oh my! Thank you for sharing. Rings so true to my heart. Xx