I asked for it. I begged God to give me an answer. Whatever the answer was, I wanted it.
It’s ironic that the week I write about my fears and doing what God has called me to do is the same week I get a huge professional rejection. But this blog began as a journal of sorts; something to catalog my ministerial successes, professional failures, random occurrences, and life in between the routine.
It would detrimental to share the good, but not the bad; the pretty without the ugly. So the ugly truth is that I was gracefully informed “I wasn’t needed after all.” A series of great opportunities are no longer waiting for me to answer because the answer was, No.
Be nice. It's freezing and we have no makeup on.
I wanted to be sad and raise an angry fist and scream to the sky, Why God, WHY? But I opted to indulge in something a bit more healthy: a book, sunset, some sugar-free chocolate, and time with Brianna.
The sun sank beneath the clouds, but peeked through radiantly at some points during his descent. I was reminded of the simple fact that the sun will rise again tomorrow. And with his return will come new opportunities and new horizons not yet seen. I asked God for an answer. And though it may have not been the answer I hoped for, it was the best answer I could receive.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future…
You made a wise descision to continue in the faith. When I pray for things, all I can do is hope it’s in God’s pecfect will. There have been times when I’ve also gotten mad and said, “Why God, Why,” only He knows. Then I have find myself, with answers like, “I’m the Potter, you’re the clay.”
Prayers not answered "our way" can be such a bummer. I know that the Lord's way is always best but it doesn't feel that way sometimes. Love you and praying for you.
i hate that. and oh, how i know it like the back of my hand!
BUT i really can't wait for the blog post that says, " remember that one time,when i ate a bag of chocolates? well, god didn't just throw me a curve ball, he made me hit a home run!…."
it's okay, if you don't believe me….we'll wait for it!! 😉
praying for you now in the sweet name of jesus. he knows, oh how he knows!
I have been there too B.
Personal: I was rejected by a guy I thought was the one and years later and married I am SO happy God closed that door since the dude is no longer walking with God.
Professional: I was hired to be the administrator for a
C.E.O. and when I was ready to go in that Monday personnel called me to say that they switched gears.
I now manage an Eng. Firm and have been here 10 years and the economy did not affect us.
Be Encouraged! Will be praying for you and don’t eat too much chocolate.
i love the way you responded to it all… i have had lots of drama in my life and am barely coming to the place where i know that God knows best when it comes to my life…i think tHe evidence shows that He is better at leading my life than i am…
And, remember, WE need you! I hope you enjoyed the chocolate and sunset!
Praying for you to continue to find peace and confidence in God's plans for you! Eating the chocolate was a wise choice 🙂
The hardest thing one has to tell her parents is that she lost her job, the day before Daddys surgery. So I waited till the day after. It was still hard.
Don't forget the continuation, which is just as important and equally ignored:
Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
– d.
I had that same reason given to me this year after over a decade of teaching there..and it hurt. It took awhile to get past it, shake off the bitterness that wanted to cling to my soul, and just trust God's direction. But it's these situations that prove to me that God is there, that He is perfect, and that His plans for me are better than I could imagine!
Bianca – you show the wisdom of God in this. The disappointment, the anger, the fist in the air – and the submission to the will of God. It is God drenched, sunlight through clouds, God's delays are not God's denials. God Bless you as you seek his will – as you so obviously do.
God's will, not our will, be done. He has something even bigger for you to do! All things work together for your good! 😉 xoxo
if i'd have been with you, it would've meant more chocolate for YOU. just sayin…
(and, for what it's worth, i believe in you SO MUCH. i can't wait to see what our sunrisingly faithful God is going to do with your heart of surrendered faithfulness. in the meantime, i know the deep ache of disappointment and i'm praying for your heart… to find hope and encouragement and strength in Him, even when it's coming from nowhere else. love you, my friend.)
Hey girl, I feel this. Just went through something very similar. Although I went with the sad-face, fist-shaking for at least three days, I came to the same conclusion as you. If I ask for an answer, I've gotta take the one He gives if I want to live in trust with him. Blessings on you as you continue to seek him through this season.
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