Within the confines of church ministry, I’m relatively young. The crown of grey hair and invisible badges of honor many tout after years of ministry pale in comparison to my four grey hairs and self-inflicted battle wounds. But I’m there. I’m serving. I’m doing my best to give back to God’s people the best way I know how.
However, sometimes we are let down and marred by the very ones we are trying to serve.
After six full years of leading in a particular ministry, I climbed into my car and sobbed after finishing up a midweek service. I couldn’t think straight, I couldn’t make sense of my surroundings, and I most definitely shouldn’t have been driving.
On the 5 freeway at 10:32pm I cried because of betrayal. I cried because of sadness. I cried because I had given the very essence of my life to leaders and students and left with nothing more than shadows of affected lives and years of fruitless toil.
Then anger set in. I was angry with ministry. I was angry with God’s people and if there was a rock around, I would’ve beat it just like Moses did! But there wasn’t. So I struck my steering wheel repeatedly with my palm of my hand as I waited at a red light regretting the past six years.
But the balm of forgiveness heals wounds in a way time cannot. And ministry isn’t a means to fulfill your calling in life, but to glorify the Giver of Life.
The core of serving is to persevere in ministry even when the fruit is futile, the rewards are ransomed, and the work seemingly worthless. As Paul says, Stand firm! Let nothing move you. Always give yourself fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor is not in vain. Ministry is hard. But our labor is not in vain. Stand firm.
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