Atop the veranda at the J. Paul Getty Museum in Los Angeles, Matthew Olthoff asked me to marry him. And I’m not sure I said yes.
Rewind.
Three weeks ago I started snooping around and asking subtle questions about my birthday. As coyly and coquettishly as possible, I tried discovering the master plan for my birthday experience. After a few days of failed discoveries, I flat out asked what we were doing for my birthday in an exasperated tone. Oh, that’s right, he dryly stated without lifting his eyes from his computer screen. Your birthday is coming up.
Without getting into reasons as to why I ignored him for the full hour of Project Runway, I will say I was internally cooling off and trying to love him in spite of his lack of care, waning love, and overwhelming apathy. But I was so angry.
It felt as if he didn’t care. He didn’t love me. He had taken for granted who I was in his life and I was now officially part of his office furniture. And, if I’m being totally honest with you, this made me question staying in our relationship. If he can’t love me the way I need to be loved or the way I love him, I confessed to my mother, I’m not sure he is the one for me.
Fast forward.
Tuesday, April 6th
Arriving to the Getty was like arriving to the Disneyland of nerds. And I felt at home. Matt and I sat on a bench with a pastry and hot beverage and talked about life, the blessings God has given me, and how special he made me feel. I still had no clue he was proposing.
After a few art collections had been viewed, he pulled out another present for me while we sat on the lawn of the Getty garden. It was a book I’ve wanted but couldn’t find. Score! Under the golden California sun we read and laughed and chatted about things we loved. I still had no clue he was proposing.
He packed an amazing lunch with various cheeses, salads, drinks, and love. He insisted we move to a new location for lunch. Begrudgingly I complied, but did so while complaining about leaving the perfectly great spot by the tree.
Atop the veranda with the Hollywood hills, downtown LA, and the Pacific ocean as our backdrop, we ate lunch and spoke about what life in the future would entail while the wind blew lightly across our faces. As dishes were wiped off and food put away, Matt asked me what I wanted to do next. I said, Today has been perfect. But I would really love to go read some more!
In true movie script form he pulls out a book wrapped in clear cellophane and says, Well… I think you should read this. He created a book complied with old emails, pictures from the last year, prayers he wrote for me, personality traits we each possess, and through it all, I had no clue he was proposing.
As I turned each page of the book I realized how much he loved me, how well he knew me, and how much he cared. The entire month he belabored over insuring I would be surprised. The lack of care was a front. The apathy was a lie. The waning love was sheer acting talent. The last page had a trifold adhered to it, sealed with a sticker. Inside was the most beautiful letter he’s ever written ending with the words, Bianca Juarez, will you marry me?
I’m not sure I even said yes. I think it was more along the sobbing lines of, I’mSoSorryIDoubtedYouILoveYouSoMuchAndI’mSorry. He kissed my forehead and slipped the ring on my finger as I cried like baby. I’m not even sure I said yes.
Matt, my answer is yes. A resounding yes! If I could marry you tomorrow and wake up next to you for the rest of my life, either in a hut or a mansion, I would. My life is better because of you and you constantly push me to discover who I am, who God is, and how I can change the world for better. I promise I will never leave you or abandon our new family and my commitment is for life… even when I want to give up and quit. Thank you for taking me back–twice. I love you more today than yesterday… but not as much as tomorrow.
AHHH…I still can’t believe it! congrats B and Matt! you’re going to have beautiful babies 🙂 i’ll be praying for you two.
<3 legra
Congrats to you and Matt!! I love the Getty and IT is the perfect place! May God continue to bless you and your family in your journey of faith and love.
Peace & Blessings,
Renee
I am beyond stoked for you! You are such an amazing woman of God and it is fabulous that you found a man who can love you til the end of time! Many blessings to your newly formed lil family! Congratulations beautiful girl!
ALMOST tears! I think my eyes even tingled a little when I read the part about your new family. Thank you, Thank you and Thank you again for sharing this with us. xoxo
So excited for you bianca… will be praying for you & for matt.
oxoxoxo
So, so overwhelmingly excited for you!! Your post (as usual) was amazing and thoughtful, provoking and honest, and beautiful.
Congratulations! I hope God just blesses your socks off!!!
WOOHOO!!!
Mary
Thank you all SOOOOO much! I’m still beaming.
I enjoyed looking over your blog. I found your profile on another blog I follow and I added myself to follow you. You are more than welcome to visit my blog and become a follower if you want to. If I have posted this on your blog before please forgive me. Sometimes it ain’t easy being an Old Geezer.
God Bless You, Ron
Bianca, this was a great post. I love what you wrote to Matt at the end. Precious. I’m glad the ‘era of shun,’ ended quickly for you:)
You know you’re “part of the family” when …
… EVERYONE reads your blog.
… big sister Cassie is your twitter friend.
… 16 y.o. Ben was excited to tell me that you were getting engaged, after he read it on Jasmine’s blog.
… 13 y.o. Hosanna reads your blog every day (and I think yours is the only blog she reads, besides big sister cassie’s)
… you’re just a daily topic of conversation around our house.
love ya!
Mama D.
weee! i’m so happy for you! that was such a sweet engangement story!!!!<3 sooo.. have you guys set a date yet? >:D
You get 1 OMG for how special and amazing this whole story is… and another OMG for how many comments you’ve gotten on this post! WOW! Congratulations and I’m so happy to hear you’ve found the love of your life who loves you like you need to be loved! 🙂 He’s something we all pray for…
How wonderful! Super congratulations to the both of you. My prayer for you is to be blessed and enjoy planning the most precious day of your new lives together. It is truly a day you will remember always and forever, write it down in your book of your new life, You and your children will look back with fondness.
May the never ending blessings of God fall upon you and Matt from this day forward.
much love
ap
I think this is so cute…later on in life you will be able to pull this out and recall all the details of how he proposed and how you felt so dont forget to save this blog haha im sure you already did though :)Bianca i am so happy for you!!! May you both be blessed together in this new chapter in life. Love you lots!!!
Hello Bianca,
what a beautiful story…I think you have the best family a I ever known only from the internet and in a little while a “Superman”. 🙂 Even if I didn’t know anybody of you personally, but because of all your writings and your and Jasmines Photos, it feels like I know you all and as if I was there.
Wish you and Matt all the best,
Markus 🙂
Someone might have already asked, but….
Is Jasmine going to do your pictures??
so beautiful. i’m really happy for you, B!
that is a totally awesome proposal story- congratulations! just goes to show that real life can be like the movies and amazing men do exist! you are a blessing and most deserving of all love and happiness. btw your ring is totally divine! xo
Simply, congratulations 🙂 Thanks for sharing your sweet story…makes me swoon 🙂
Congrats!! The proposal was so romantic!! 🙂
Congratulations to you and Matt all the way from Malaysia! Hugs!
Kuria! Thanks for the Malaysian hug 🙂 That’s rad.
Tears starting developing when I read about the book and I even knew about the book from Jasmines post but still got me, what a thoughtful gift, he is amazing~ and can not wait for your wedding, you are such a blessing, what a great proposal
Way to go Bianca and Mike. Glad i had the chance to see you together!
Promise and I just read this post. LOVE IT!!!! So good and we are sooo happy for you and Matt!
We hope we get the chance to continue to be a part of your lives for years to come and we know that you’ll love marriage as much as we do!! It really is the best gift God has ever given to me!
We love you much and share in your excitement in these days! Let us know if you need anything! 🙂
Brian & Promise
Tears starting developing when I read about the book and I even knew about the book from Jasmines post but still got me, what a thoughtful gift, he is amazing~ and can not wait for your wedding, you are such a blessing, what a great proposal
Promise and I just read this post. LOVE IT!!!! So good and we are sooo happy for you and Matt! We hope we get the chance to continue to be a part of your lives for years to come and we know that you’ll love marriage as much as we do!! It really is the best gift God has ever given to me! We love you much and share in your excitement in these days! Let us know if you need anything! :)Brian & Promise
Congrats!! The proposal was so romantic!! 🙂
Tears starting developing when I read about the book and I even knew about the book from Jasmines post but still got me, what a thoughtful gift, he is amazing~ and can not wait for your wedding, you are such a blessing, what a great proposal
Congratulations to you and Matt all the way from Malaysia! Hugs!
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WOW! Good job to Mr. Olthoff. I'm reading this probably a year after the fact and still found it incredibly sweet and thoughtful.
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