To all my single ladies in the house, I’ve got this little diddy for you. If I was half as talented as this girl and had her hair, I would be on every street corner beatboxing this truth. Because it’s the truth… and the truth will set you free.
And for the gentlemen who visit on the sly, there are women who are waiting for you to step up. Not step up to the invitation to coffee or a marriage proposal, but to step up to being the man God has called you to be. Not perfect, but aiming to be. Not rich, but responsible. Not arrogant, but with a confident swag in knowing who you are… rather, who’s you are. 😉
And who knows? Maybe we can have a love connection RIGHT HERE ON THE BLOG! Woohoo. If ya’ll meet and marry, I’m guaranteed the spot of your flower girl. Done!
For the single girls, what are you looking for in a man? For the single men, what are you looking for in a woman?
Interesting…I just wrote about singleness today!
I’ve loved this since the first time I saw it. Doesn’t her confidence just ROCK?! Sometimes it’s there for me, sometimes it’s not (as my tweet from the other day implied!).
The older I get, the shorter my wish list becomes. At this point, my gut tells me that I just need a man who loves Jesus, loves me, loves his family, and is a leader!
XO!
A-Freaking-Men!
pretty simple, really. MUST.LOVE.JESUS.
I believe you should add: And have a job! 😉
I saw this a few months ago when Sal introduced me to these spoken word videos and ohmygosh I was speechless…I loved it becuase she was able to put into (beautiful and rhythmically provocative) words what I’m looking for. I want a MAN who loves, serves and stands for my God in every aspect of his life.
p.s. I kind of miss you.
I missed you at the retreat! PS Who’s Sal? Is he available? Hook it up!
I had to take the CSET that Saturday morning so I was a no show at the retreat 🙁
Tests=story of my life.
He’s a guy I serve with in the HS, he is HAPPILY married to an awesome woman whom I love named Monica, and has some super cute kids. But other than that, he’s free! Hahaha
I was going to get involved in this conversation but then I saw the flower girl clause! The bride is supposed to be the prettiest girl in the bridal party! Who stands a chance with you as a flower girl?! Geez!
Powerful! Patiently waiting and Praying for a man she so eloquently describes:)
I have loved this spoken word ever since I first heard it. I’m snapping my fingers on the inside. =) So. Good.
You should watch some of the other pieces that P4CM has put out on YouTube. My current favorite is by this same girl, Janette…ikz, and Ezekiel, entitled “Ready or Not?” It talks about how Jesus is coming back for His bride; the question is whether we’ll be ready for it or not. And I think it’s another good representation of the characteristics of a good relationship, since we are to love our husband/wife as Christ loves the church. It’s so full of grace, passion, and challenge; I love it!
Wow.
Let me say, men are scared of messing up. The longer they wait the more they watch all the broken marriages and afraid that they’ll fail, too. Guess what? You will fail. Maybe every day, but the key is not you and it’s not me. It’s Jesus. It’s dying every day. So man, be of good courage and move forward. Walk in Him, not in fear.
We need good men who are strong and courageous.
Whoa, this girl was really good. I like it.
What do I want? I want a girl who is not going to try to play the holy spirit in my life. Honestly, there are a lot of girls at my church who are holier-than-thou and it’s annoying. How can I lead when they try to have all their junk together?
Lastly, physical attraction is important. I’m not saying a girl has to be skinny or have a great body, but it’s really attractive when a girl takes care of herself. She doesn’t have to have a 6-pack, but its cool when they workout and care about how the they look. I don’t want a super model… I just want her to feel like she’s a beautiful daughter of our King.
Very cool, Mike! I think it’s a balanced perspective 🙂
Feeling like the “beautiful daughter of our King” and looking like our society’s view of what that may be are two completely different things.
Women struggle so much with our body image and get enough pressure from guys and girls alike, so we need to find comfort in the truth that God thinks we’re beautiful just as we are – 100 pounds or 300 pounds – because we are His Beloved and He formed us in His image.
I believe some women (me included) are looking for a guy who can see our heart, not a taken care of body that will change shape over time.
Man, I love this video. She is SO talented. I keep it on the recently-played videos on my phone for when I’m feeling down. It just reminds me who I’m waiting for.
What am I looking for in a man? I used to have a long list. Now I just want him to be in love with Jesus. And I’m trusting that if God will send me that man, then He’ll send me one that I kind of like some other things about him, too! 🙂
You can definitely be my flower girl. Just be prepared that the wedding might be in the middle of a pumpkin patch or a cornfield.
Pumpkin patch? Cornfield? I’M SO IN!
Have to keep to my family roots. What better place than the fields 😉
I want to know if she’s found her man yet! That was amazing and so inspiring. So beautiful!
“His first name Luke, his last name Warm”… DANG!!!
I’ve seen this so many freaking times & it never gets old. And I have to say it’s hard to describe in better words than hers what I want. But I feel that it might be a lot of pressure for a guy to live up to, just like I feel Proverbs 31 is a lot for me to live up to. Not that I don’t want to embody it, but it’s a lot!
I used to have a list of requirements, but as I’ve matured & learned more about God’s purpose for marriage & His desires for me, I think my biggest hope (other than being a follower of Christ of course) is that he’ll love all of me… despite my past, despite my flaws. That’s what I pray for.
I think Mike Erre totally blew me away on Sunday night when he said something like “Come to the terms with the fact that you will marry a sinner.” That’s a hard pill to swallow because we do look for perfection. But I do not embody perfection, so it’s unrealistic to expect my helpmate to do so either.
You should check out http://www.onfirefastmovement.blogspot.com – It’s written by Shellie R. Warren & she is amazing. Her heart for preparing single women for marriage is beautiful. I adore her.
Loves God, loves people, pursues God-given vision, has a sense of humor and is handsome (in my eyes at least)
I’ve thought a lot about this. Hopefully this isn’t too picky…
1. She love Jesus.
2. loves sports
3. loves fishing.
4. loves hanging out.
5. loves relaxing at home.
I’m not that picky but this girls seems like she doesn’t exist. 🙁
Oh Phil, Phil, Phil. May I be blunt?
I’m not sure you’re looking for a woman. I believe you’re looking for man in a female body. The list, though not long, is quite descriptive of perhaps a really good guy friend. Maybe—perhaps—you can think about wants that will require you to give of yourself for her. Food for thought 😉
hahahaha your response made me laugh bc I was thinking the same thing
Actually, I fit 4 of the 5 in his list. I don’t care for fishing…but I do love sports. Specifically college football 🙂
I’m glad Bianca said it first! Hobbies are important, but values are where you’ve gotta start. The loves Jesus one is good 🙂
No more love connections. Please.
I’m pretty sure I know what I want and it’s not gonna happen. Not if I don’t do some serious soul searching and make some ch-ch-changes. The words are like vinegar in my mouth!
Someone who loves God more than He loves me!
Speaks truth into my life both in the good and bad times!
Wants to walk through the good/bad together!
Lives a gospel centered life!
Seeks adventure!
And is definitely NOT perfect…because he won’t love me if He is…:-)
Eek! I met Janette Ikz a couple of weeks ago, girl is toooo legit! la la love her! 🙂
And for what I’m (or should I say we single ladies 😉 are looking for: A man that is genuinely in love with Christ and life, confidence, AND for the love of everything holy, a man with a sense of humor! 😉 Just cause you’re Christian doesn’t mean you should be dry and boring, know what I mean?? One thing Janette Ikz said at a benefit show a few weeks ago is that Christian guys are going extinct, and that is the truth! I’ve met many guys who say they are Christian, yet miss church on Sundays because they partied too hard the night before
🙁 But like this poem, I will wait. Because if I never meet the “One” , my heart will still be content in Jesus 🙂
Love you Bianca!
xxo
Anneliese
Someone who loves Jesus with all his heart and lives it. He loves Jesus more than me. Disciplined, speaks in love, justice, leader, honest (all this will be in-scripted into his life if he loves Jesus with all his heart). He must be living all these things before I meet him and continues to do them after I meet him.
That’s all.
P.S. I am a hard core youth group leader so his heart must be for youth, because someday my door will be wide open for them to entertain themselves in my house (with boundaries of course) but if God provides me a house it will be used for ministry, so his heart must be going in the same direction as mine in that way.
very powerful message! thanks for sharing, Bianca! Where and when did you hear of Janette? We need people to speak the truth in love with freestyle! 🙂
OHHHHH LORRRRRDDDDD……this is amazing. First time I see it and after 430957984567 years, somebody put in words what I have been desiring in my heart lol.
After a breakup with a guy with a low percent of what she described lol – I really cannot say what I want cause I just don’t want somebody right now you know? Is hard, deep inside I feel Im cheating on my ex boyfriend if I put a list…lol…
BUT if I had to choose juts a word to say what I think women should look for in a guy would be a: Spiritual leader- that is their biblical ask anyway!lol
I do have to confess thou that from time to time when I see a happy godly couple, I can help biut to feel jealous and think: “they must have problems and she is NOT free”–maybe because of my psat relationship.
I know God has a purpose, a perfect plan for my life so instead of making a list, I just want to put alll I have working in the kingdom, as a single, doing all the crazy things that I am doing for the Lord lol, at least for now lol.
It’s become less specific, but higher demand. I’m looking for someone who has .TENACITY.
{courage. determination. steadfastness. heart. guts. perseverance. stick-to-itiveness}
Tenacity with his faith, job, relationships, family, goals …
And I really, really want someone to meet up on your blog 🙂
What I want in a man is someone who loves Jesus, is my best friend, will be the spiritual leader for our family, loves me regardless of what I look like and in spite of my faults, laugh with me and at me, be willing and able to provide for our family. What I’m physically attracted to changes although I do love a man in uniform 😉 As I get older, my list doesn’t necessarily get longer – just more specific.
I’m looking for a man who loves Jesus, that he loves Jesus so much, it’s incredibly attractive. What’s more attractive/intriguing about a man, than one who inspires and challenges my walk with Jesus?
A man who understands what mission in the day-to-day looks like, and who wrestles with the joyful and heartbreaking in that.
A guy who listens well, and is able to catch what I’m not saying, but implying. Perceptive.
A guy with a huge heart, who loves those around him with his gifts, talents and abilities.
C
I love this! I remember watching it about a million times before I got together with my now ex-boyfriend. A boyfriend who was intentional, amazing, who loved me then one day just decided we “weren’t meant to be” after saying it over and over.
So, now I have to stand on that truth again and KNOW that God is good, that His perfect plan is GOOD and that NOTHING will stop that from working out when we keep Him at the Centre.
xx M
I want a man who will be so lost in God.Humourous and Responsible but then when you are so lost in God,every other habit will fall into place.
that was jaw-droppingly awesome Bianca! I will definitely be posting this to facebook for my single lady friends. what an encouragement and list of what you should look for in a souse!! THANKS!
I saw this video a while ago on a friend’s blog and was completely moved. Being thrown back into the dating world after 4 years is absolutely terrifying to me. But I do have to say that it’s made me realize that I deserve more than what I had. I deserve to be someone’s priority and not just a time filler.
I know that God has a plan for me. But if I could help him, I’d love a man who loves the Lord more than he loves me, hardworking but not a workaholic, someone who will lead me and advise me when I need it (whether I know it or not), enjoys sports (specifically hockey), and most importantly someone who can make me laugh.
Paul said if your loosed don’t seeked to be married and if your married don’t seek to be loosed. Good advice from an apostle of God. Not that getting married is wrong to the contrary better to marry than burn with passion. Paul did say u will have much trouble and tribulation in marriage. For the single folks you have an ultimate blessing in that all your focus can be on serving the Lord. God never promised us a spouse so it may never happen but if you have Jesus that’s all u need. The ideal woman would be one who loves Jesus more than anything and a woman who doesn’t love this world. A woman who dies to self and who loses her own life in this world that she may gain it where it really counts in the Kingdom of Heaven where our citzenship is. Also a woman who does not want the American dream and all the deceptive trappings that come with it. A woman who would rather go to mexico and serve the less fortunate than take a vacation to Hawaii.
A gentle lion.
I read a short book (don’t remember the author) that talked about the lion and the lamb.
When God created Adam, Adam had the full image of God- he had the lion (the strong, reliable, protective one) and the lamb (gentle, submissive, self-sacrificing). But when God took part of Adam and created Eve, He separated the lion and lamb. Together, the two make the completeness of God’s image.
I love that, and I know it sounds contrary to a lot of women’s opinions, but I can’t wait to submit to a strong spiritual leader (not that it will be easy). I only pray that he will bear his strength gently, not proudly. And I pray that I will show him the respect that he needs to help him maintain that heart.
I have high expectations of the man my Father has for me, but I know he’s not coming soon because I’m nowhere near worthy of being his.
My main desire in a man is someone who is wholly devoted to being what God has created him to be. A man who is willing to work hard to be the best version of himself and isn’t afraid to hold his partner to the same standard. I am not holding out for a perfect man by a long shot, but if his heart’s desire is to please the Lord then I am convinced that God will mold him into His image. He’s done the same with me; I could never question it. If his devotion is towards pleasing God… and God’s thoughts toward me are good, I have nothing to worry about. If my faith is in Him and not my husband, then it gives him the freedom (and me the protection from being damaged) to make the mistakes he’s going to make. I just feel like I’m looking for a man with the right heart, because the good things (i.e. work ethic, respect, selflessness, ect) will come with that. As far as basic personality goes, I would love to be with someone with a sense of humor, who is intelligent and has good taste in music. Everything else… not too worried. 🙂
Oh my goodness. Thank you so much for posting this, Bianca. I have been feeling lonely, lately, really lonely and this is just what I needed to hear. I WILL WAIT!
ummm… this is seriously HAWT!!! I am a person who loathes spoken word, but this was absolutely beautiful & just might change my mind!!! thank you for sharing B! … & yes, I WILL WAIT!!! xo,dana
P.S. thank you for your prayers love, I’ve experienced the peace & joy of God! I am trusting in Him! Prov 3:5-6 love you!
“Actually, I fit 4 of the 5 in his list. I don’t care for fishing…but I do love sports. Specifically college football ”
Wait, no, that can’t be, the other women on these comments are assuring men that women don’t like sports and don’t like hanging out.
“I read a short book (don’t remember the author) that talked about the lion and the lamb.
When God created Adam, Adam had the full image of God- he had the lion (the strong, reliable, protective one) and the lamb (gentle, submissive, self-sacrificing). But when God took part of Adam and created Eve, He separated the lion and lamb. Together, the two make the completeness of God’s image. ”
And here we go again … Look at the woman in Song of Songs. She is quite reliable, strong, brave, adventurous, daring, etc….