Tooth-less. He was missing teeth, but not all of them. It didn’t stop him from smiling widely as he held is daughter in his arms and kissed her matted hair. She wore a pink zip-up sleeper with footsies and hid in the nape of her father’s neck as we spoke.
She’s beautiful just like her momma. But she’s a daddy’s girl, his gaped tooth smile slowly left his face as he painfully added, and she’s HIV positive. His voice trailed off in the conversation of medicare, prescriptions, and weekly injections. He arrived at the medical clinic around 7:30am with his two children. He was in desperate need of dental care, but since he lost his job three months ago he’s been unable to see a dentist. Or see a doctor. Or provide enough food.
Photo by D. Park Photography
We spoke about life. His life. And what that looked like with an HIV positive wife checked into a local hospital for clinical depression. I wasn’t a doctor or even a therapist. But I was a face who cared and wanted to know about his life, his story, his sorrow.
So I listened. And listened. And listened.
More than anything he wanted to be known. He wanted to be heard. He wanted to share his story so he told me his name, his daughter’s name, and his son’s name several times. I’m not embarrassed to talk about it. I want everyone to know our story. Everyone needs to know it can happen to anyone… anyone. He turned his mouth and kissed Linda Pearl’s matted head with his tooth-less mouth and cried in the nape of her neck.
Dan Allender said our name is our identity and most likely the only syllables and sound that will mean the most to us in our entire life. Dale Carnegie developed a multimillion-dollar business based on teaching people to win friends and influenced people by saying someone’s name a minimum of three times during a conversation. A famous television sitcom sold the setting and premise from the show with the tagline, “You want to go where everybody knows your name.”
And just like you, and me, and Rusty, we want to be known.
I walked Rusty over to the STD and HIV testing center when his number was called. I told him I will be praying for his family, but most importantly I’d keep telling his story. Rusty’s words spoke depths of truth, It can happen to anyone.
Photo by D. Park Photography
Black, Latino, Muslim, Filipino, White, and Asian men and women lined up as early as 1:00am on Saturday morning to wait for free medical, dental, and vision care. And each one of them had a story as to why they were there. I wasn’t extracted teeth or drawing blood, but I was listening—and listening matters.
Today life will go on. I will work, eat heartily, brush my teeth and live prescription-free. But life will not be the same because I met Rusty who was hoping he wasn’t HIV positive, Linda Joy who laughed carelessly unaware she was battling a disease, and countless others who simply wanted to be known. Their life will go on and so will their story.
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