Quintessential Women’s Ministry
Women’s ministry comes a host of stigmas. Tea parties, luncheons, brunches, doilies, dresses, and all things pink. But I believe there’s a new type of girl who is not just looking for a place to sip tea and talk about how cute their children are. Women—whether married, single, divorced, or widowed—are looking for meaningful fellowship, Christ-centered encouragement, and real relationships.
But many of my friends are anti-women’s ministry. Like, at the invitation to attend an event they go into convulsion and experience heart palpitations. Either that or go into a diatribe about how they have nothing in common with women experiencing menopause. I laugh because it’s mean… but I also laugh because it’s kind of true.
There’s a need. We know it. But now I’m hearing women talk about how they run their women’s ministry soooo much different than everyone else. One woman explained an event she planned and ending the conversation by excitedly saying, This ain’t your momma’s women’s ministry!
Oh noooooo she didn’t! She did not just bring my MOMMA into this?!
Before taking off my earrings and pulling back my hair to start brawling with this girl, I asked her if there was a way to reverent to the past while being relevant to the future. She couldn’t answer.
I believe there needs to be change. But change doesn’t mean excommunicating women who like pink, women with kids, or women experiencing hot flashes [God bless them]. It means loving each other like we love our self, discussing new things [whether a college course or kid’s camp], and celebrating our different stages in life.
In the famous words of Rodney King during the LA riots, Can’t we all just get along?
Just so you know, my momma’s women’s ministry is awesome. So awesome in fact, I’m speaking at their annual Christmas boutique tonight at 7pm and you’re invited. There will probably be some doilies around, but don’t worry, I won’t be wearing pink.
Good luck tonight Bianca! Go get em girl! xoxo
You are so right, we need the new – WITH reverence to the old – or our path back to the first century becomes broken.
I think this goes for men too. And as a man, this is what I just read, and I hope I got it right.
Midnight blue is the new pink – but pink is classic, and still very much au courant.
Thank you Bianca
Haha I love it! Style-savvy and biblical, you're awesome Craig 🙂
I have seen a couple of women's ministries around where I live that focuses on, encourages and even teaches generational mentoring. This has been a blessing to SO many women I know and has been a great way to minister to all age groups while ministering to women as a whole at the same time.
Love this post! I'm so excited about the future of women's ministry and hope to help the women in my church/community/neighbourhood find that fellowship and meaningful relationships in a way that is relevant to them…whether they like pink or not! Have a great time tonight! x
i love this post…i think there is a need…but i also worry about the line being crossed as far as trying to be too relevant and forgetting the foundation of it all…so i love your line.."reverent to the past while being relevant to the future"…
Love this post B!! …….. "reverent to the past while being relevant to the future…" We are trying to achieve this within our women's ministry at church……thanks to you my dear. Would you like to sip some tea with me tonight? Love Mom
Yay! <— that is my approval of women's ministry.
hehe I'm a women's ministry junkie. Anything women related and I'm there… like tonight. I'll be watching you and not in a stalkerish way lol.
I love you B but I don't understand the separation of this generation? In my 20's I loved sitting under the older, seasoned women. They all had so much to offer plus I found my mentor in the women's ministry. Is it the "ministry" that is hard to relate to or is it the women?
I have been thinking about this for a while. There is definitely a need at my church as well. There is a woman's group but all they do is go shopping and to the movies. Not to say that those things are bad, I too am always on the lookout for a good deal and love movies but I am looking for more than what I can do on my own or with my closest girlfriends. I am looking for fellowship that also involves getting into the word and discussing issues that are woman specific. The bigger problem is that the woman who runs it is Pastor's daughter and isn't very receptive to change and/or outside opinion. So, I will perhaps have a dinner/bible study at my house and ask the women who attend to prepare studies on a rotation. This way everyone shares, everyone can bring up topics they are passionate about, and more importantly everyone can eat. LOL.
Sidebar: Thank you so much for being so transparent about who you are and all that that entails. I look forward every morning to reading your entry. You are a blessing, hot mess and all. And, gurl, I can relate. Be blessed! Maria
couldnt have said it better!!! I love sitting with older & younger women.. I learn from both!!!
AWESOME!!! My church is full of older women. In fact there are only very few “younger” ladies. I have learned soo incredibly much from these older women. I’ve been blessed. They’re also teaching me about them hot flashes and what to do about them! LOVE THOSE LADIES!!! I do miss the Women’s Ministry though. The teas, the dinners, the boutiques, the Tuesday night studies. The fellowship.. I need that, I need more fellowship. You are tremendously blessed!!! Wish I could be there… Rock on… and pink is a beautiful color..
Btw… you know I’ve been praying for you about mothering.. Well, guess what? i think I’m gonna be a momma again.. hahaha! 😉
You are so right Bianca. At our church we've worked hard to reinvent women's ministry while gleaning from the wisdom of those who have gone before us. We have a retreat coming up and I often hear, "I'm not a women's retreat kind of person." To which I respond, "Neither have I been, but you will loooove this." We love pink, doilies… not so much… we embrace femininity and a woman's need to talk about everything that pulls on her emotions including hormones (the good, the bad and the ugly) and yet we know that women have a vital role to play in the Kingdom of God, in families, in church, in the marketplace and in communities. We love to equip women to walk in the manner worthy in which THEY have been called and we've all been called to our own story. Thanks for posting this and I really hope it encourages many women to join the force of sisterhood that God created. 🙂
I was having lunch on Sunday with my sisters and a friend saying what a wonderful Women’s Ministry CCM has. God willing we will be there tonight.
I love my small group! Seriously, I think I would lose it if I didnt have those girls. We cry, we laugh, and challenge one another. Thanks for this encouraging post Bianca! Ps. Are ppl allowed to call you 'B'? Like people other than your friends and family, because I have this big urge to call you B like were best friends…Oh dear, Im making a fool of myself!
The comment I hear most from women around me is that we want to put down our tea cups and pick up our swords. Are we engaged in the battle or not? If we aren't encouraging each other to use our weapons and fight we are going to get trampled on and beat up.
Cut me some slack. I am a table leader at SMILES (Satisfied Moms In Life's Everyday Situations)…and I don't even have kids!!! I get down with the doilies when at all possible. And nothing but love for my BFF Millie!
Haha! This just made me think of the very first time I did a teaching with our women's ministry. 80% of the women had hair in buns and silver locks. I said, "OK, Lord! If this is where you have me – this is where I'll be!" It has been a blessing beyond belief to stand alongside women who have traveled the road before me while also trying to engage others my age. I am in the minority, but I know God is stirring something because this has been a conversation I've had a lot lately. And love that: "reverent to the past, relevant to the future."
I don't think this is specific to women's ministry, but more specific to gathering women of different generations together. As an adult member of a sorority, we have alumni chapters that women of any age can be in. We have 22 year olds and 80 year olds in the same chapter. And so…choosing a chapter to be a part of can be difficult (if you live in a place with options) because some chapters have more older women, while others have more younger members. There are benefits to either kind: chapters with older members tend to be more established chapters with more resources (because older women have $$$ 🙂 ), whereas younger chapters might have more interesting events, but may not have as many resources; they may not also be as invested as older members and attendance is smaller.
I don't know if I agree that we need to be more reverent to the past, but, I do think that we all have gifts and we all have our place in the body of Christ. I think women of all generations can contribute to a group effort with all of their strengths, and everyone benefit in the end.
I have mixed feelings about this topic to be perfectly honest, but I plan to be there tonight. 🙂
I love the way you said that – reverent the past by being relevant to the future. That says it all.
If the ministry is built on and around the Word and not the other hoopla, it should be relevant to any age. In fact, the Word teaches older women to teach younger, which involves respect and hanging out together. I love being around older godly women – their wisdom and support is a treasure! It is not the age and not the style, but pretentiousness that is repulsive about some women groups – older AND young! Thank you for standing up for unity!
Amen!
I'll be honest… I do cringe at a lot of womens ministry. But a lot of that is because the arrogant 21 year old that I am wants everything to be my way. A good women's ministry should do exactly what the church is meant to do. No more, no less. The message is the same, the model may change.
you are speaking my language…would love to have you at GFL talking about this. I really struggle, because I love being with women,but I also cringe at the thought of traditional women's ministries. What to do? How to find the balance? Most women I know need (and want) real, honest, encouraging relationships with women outside of their stage of life. Church, when done well, does THAT very well. We need to be part of a generation of women who cheer each other on rather than separate ourselves from our "mommas," tea, pink and all.
Has presumptuousness come? Then dishonor will come but wisdom is with the modest ones.
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