Being a chick is dramatic. Or maybe I’m just dramatic. [No one answer that.] But I let all the little voices in my head sometimes get the best of me and honestly, I want it stop.
I’m in Knoxville, Tennessee for the CHIC conference and there are thousands of students here excitedly celebrating life, liberty, and the pursuit of Jesus. I get to be one small voice among a retinue of leaders who get to speak truth into their lives. What an honor! What a privilege! What a scary thought!
I woke up this morning with the feeling that I—quite possibly—could fail. In the theater of my mind I will trip up the stairs to the platform then fall off the side of the stage. And die. From embarrassment. [Ok, so maybe I’m a little bit dramatic.] Or worse, I will fall short of conveying the beauty, glory, and awesomeness that is Christ.
Lies birthed from insecurity will cripple us from running the race Christ has set before us. I know this. Therefore I’m choosing to hold onto the Truth as stated in God’s word:
- We are anointed
- He has a plan for our lives
- In our weakness, He is strong
- In our failures, He is still unchanged
- In the midst of ashes, He can make something beautiful*
I know I’m not alone in my fear of failure and many others struggle with believing that God wants the best and will do the best with our lives. So it’s you that I’m speaking to. Today I want to commit that we pray hard and strong to believe God can, will, and does have the best for our lives.
I’m not as much afraid of falling as I am of falling short of dispensing the awesome, majestic, life-changing power of the gospel. Please, please, pretty please, can you join me in praying for the students who will be in the arena tonight?
Thank you for being part of my growing journey. I’m a hot mess, but I know there are others out there who can raise up a hand and say, I’m a hot mess too, but I am standing with you believing God can take a holy hot mess and turn it into a message! To all the hot messes in the house, I say THANK YOU!
Thanks to photographer Daley Hake for this image from opening night!
*Don’t believe me? Check out: 1 John 2:20, Jeremiah 29:11, 1 Corinthians 12:9, and Isaiah 61:3
I don’t know what a hot mess is, but I’ve got your back and am _____________ 😉
You don’t need to know what a hot mess is, you just need to know you are one! 😉 Hahahahahahahaha! I’m so funny.
Praying for you….that His word will minister to many hearts
Love nayi ox
From Cali to New York, this boricua loves you!
I feel like a hot mess every single day! You are definitely not alone, and putting it out there reminds the rest of us that we’re not alone, either. Just remember you’re there for a reason and you may never even know the full impact you make on someone when you speak, even if you feel like you’ve completely flubbed something up. I’m sure you’ll be great!
Oh you Texas girl, you! Thanks for your words of encouragement. I value you deeply, child! (<-----I said that to sound Southern) 😉
Bianca: From one hot mess to another, I’m in….praying for you, the students and the “hot” message I know you’ll give…. I think I need that prayer for myself too. May I borrow/use it??
Use and borrow away, Carol! Thanks for your prayers and encouraging tweets 🙂
From one hot mess to another I am praying 🙂
Hot messes unite! Thanks for the prayers!
The first thing I learned when I was brought into The Kingdom through The New Covenant, and feel free to use this, is that God my Father has given me the freedom to fail.
Yes. Fail.
Let that sink in, my family in Christ, and I guarantee it will open the doors of His Kingdom to you, here and now, this side of Heaven. It profits not a single one of us to be harder on ourselves than He is on us, for indeed, His yoke is light. Just sayin’. 🙂
WORD! I think you gave a prophetic word, Donald. F’real. Thanks for keeping it real.
Praying for you. Such an honor to speak with that list of people. Enjoy it. Just get out of the way and let Him do the speaking. I know you will do great.
Seriously Jeremy, I can’t thank you enough. I know you are a man of God simply by watching the way you interact with your family. I SO appreciated (and needed) your prayers!
Much love to you and Michelle!
Late last night I read Jeremiah 29 11 for the first time and then read it here. Talk about signs and wonders! Praise the Lord for he is so good!
You will do a great job – sending over prayers for you and your students.
That was totally a word for me. Thank you so much, Sheila.
I’m raising my hand and saying, “I’m a hot mess too, but I am standing with you believing God can take a holy hot mess and turn it into a message! ” – Amen! Praying for you.
I owe you! Thanks so much.
Out of all of the speakers, my dear daughter is most excited to hear YOU (and Francis Chan).
She gave me a link and told me we might be able to watch it LIVE. So, I’ll be looking for you.
Praying for you and for all of the students who are there this week. Knowing that the Lord will use you (in all of your hot messiness) to speak in you and through you.
Be BLESSED!
Laurel 🙂
Oh Laurel!!! 1. I love you. 2. I love Covenant. 3. I really thought I’d be able to meet up with one from your dozen, but I was SO overwhelmed by the amount of students. 4. This means we will have to meet some other time… soon!
Hosanna was sorry she didn’t get to meet you, but she LOVED the whole conference.
We DEFINITELY have to meet up on our next Southern CA trip. We have good friends that live by Ontario and are hoping to visit them again in the next few months.
Let me know if you are ever up in the Seattle area. We would LOVE to meet you “in real life”.
Mama D.
Praying for you mija………….love you!
From back in the day until now, you’ve always loved me. Thank you so much!
Praying sista!
Thank you! I felt so covered.
I’d like to think that we are cool chemistry experiments in the Kingdom(smile). He mixes all up in the crucible of life>combustion! Life is never boring:)
YES! Much love to you, D!
Praying for you…..I sooooo get what it’s like to be a Hot Mess. The beauty is that God speaks Sweet Somethings through you and i’m sure many will be touched by HIS words. BTW-I LOVE your Drama cuz then I don’t fell like i’m so bad…sorry just being real. Love you!!!
From one drama queen to another, I love you. From one Christian sister to another, I thank you.
Bianca, I am a Youth Director from NJ leading a group of students at CHIC this week. God used your words tonight to penetrate deeply into the hearts of my students! In our small group conversation after the main stage, I asked our students to come up with one word to describe tonight. “Majestic, strong, eye-opening, breakthrough, empowering” we’re just a few of the words shared. Most importantly, several of my students committed their lives to Christ tonight! The God of the Impossible is and will continue to use you in many powerful ways. Thanks so much for sharing with us tonight. You’re a blessing!
Jeff, this means more to me than you’ll ever know. Thank you.
Can you be my mentor? Hey, it doesn’t hurt to ask…lol. I’m trying your advice from your blog posts, you know be bold and courageous 🙂 hehe..bless u immensely!
-Destiny-
Hey Bianca,
Im Mama D’s Dozen’s daughter. And i just wanted to say that you are amazing!!! Im sooo glad i got to hear you and you didnt look like a hot mess! You were and are so beautiful! Im soo thankful i got to hear what you had to say! CHIC was soo great but you made it even better! I learned soo much from you and all the other speakers! God truly worked big time there! I had hoped to meet you but i guess it’ll have to be another time! 🙂
In Christ
Hosanna
PS i thought what you said “But Bianca he’s soo hot… well so is hell so run away!” was sooo funny! I still laugh when i think about it 🙂