I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Don’t date, just court. Wait until God brings you “the One.” Holding hands leads to sex.
I’m a bit leery of blanket statements, how-to books, and generalities. What happens is we hear how one way of dating worked for this one amazing person and expect the same outcome for ourselves. We do the same things in the same order the same way, yet garnish different outcomes. As a result, we become disillusioned, marginalized, guilty, or worse, give up entirely.
The youth pastor I served under made it very clear about the standard for the leaders. Since I worked closely under him, I was expected to follow his standards by the example he set. He was gracious and loving, yet strong and determined to not let anyone falter into sin as he once did in his “B.C. days” (the Christianese phrase used to describe your life before Christ).
However, our levels of temptation were different and my convictions weren’t nearly as tightly wound as his. But, because he was my leader and I respected him greatly, I vowed to keep away from boys like they were the plague. If I didn’t receive a handwritten note from God indicating a particular guy was “the one,” I wouldn’t as much as engage in conversation. If there wasn’t divine writing in the sky, I wouldn’t talk to a guy for more than a few minutes. If seas didn’t part, water turn into blood, or manna fall from heaven, I would assume it was a Satanic ploy to stumble me in my righteous living.
The very thought of a invitation to coffee was anathema! I might be hurt if I like him and he doesn’t like me. He might think I’m his Proverbs 31 woman. He might ask me out again. Might, might, might. Maybe, maybe, maybe. We become paralyzed by fear and inactive in the plan God may have orchestrated.
This week I was asked if being asked out to coffee was a date. I get this question often so I am reposting an older vlog I did about a year ago. Forgive me in advance for sounding like a bumbling fool.
What has or hasn’t worked for you? What tips can you give? Share the goods 🙂
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